“Hatred for guides overtaken by Massive Pink Flamingo Floaty”
Saw a few of these craft hanging from the Sam’s Club roof today. The first thing I thought of was “Hatred for guides overtaken by Massive Pink Flamingo Floaty”.
Although the hatred for guides delivered by those who surf the Massive Pink Flamingo Floaty cruising down the river in style will still hate fishing guides. But I did think for a couple happy moments that the attention would temporarily be diverted by that thing.
Often have I been crashed into parked on anchor 27′ from the shore. Parked. Stopped.
I have found that the best policy is not to say a word to anyone near the floaty device. Control of such crafts does not exist. Keeping my mouth closed produces the best results.
“You don’t own the river” is the most common phrase coming from the mouths of the Massive Pink Flamingo Floaty passengers. “We didn’t see you” is the second most common.
I like to respond with one of two comments…
- Yep, I know. You do.
- Do you crash into parked cars on the side of the road?
So you may see one of these colossal inflatable up close this summer on a river near you. Just remember that it is your fault if you make contact with their craft even when you are on anchor, tucked in close to the shore.
So watch out, and bite your tongue!